Tsunkatse

*** (3 stars out of 5)

I've learned two very important things from this episode: 1) a Dermaline hypospray will prevent horrible sunburn even under two suns. And 2) what prevents stunt casting? Nothing!

The Norcadians invented a Pay Per View bloodsport holographically broadcasting deadly gladiator combat across the sector. Greedy, sadistic Penk kidnaps combatants from Pendari and surrounding worlds. All to keep himself in moustache pomade. (That's one weird moustache, actually. Is it growing out of his lip and tied behind his head, or growing out of the back of his head and pasted to his lip? Or, upsettingly, growing from two roots and woven together? Either way, this is The Moustache Jeffrey Combs!)

If Tom is to be believed Torres still has a stuffed toy targ called Toby. But he'd better watch what Borg he tells this to. B'Elanna is in the command seat today, and I wouldn't put it past her to promote Toby to the helm.

Under the tutelage of her fellow captive (a Hirogen Mr. Miyagi with the voice of Martok), Seven-san is forced to battle Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson for the Eyebrow Belt. Who will survive? Who will fall? Who saw 'The Gamesters of Triskelion'?

"Tsunkatse" had the highest viewership rating of Season 6. It had the working title of "Arena", but it turns out Star Trek already has that episode. For the moral value, if any, of this entry: I take from the routine of Louis C.K.'s "Of Course"..."Maybe". "Of Course"... the enlightened people of the future deplore violence! Perish the thought! But "Maybe"... Super Smackdown is Radical!

Somewhere between those ideas come the sighs of mediocrity.