Saturday, February 13, 2021

The Brightest Star

 *** (3 brightest stars out of 5) 

 Sometimes, a society will put very stupid and destructive systems in place that harm millions over thousands of years. 


Welcome to Kaminar! Grab a basket and pick some kelp. Don’t catch space puberty or you’ll vanish into the sky forever. Don’t ever question it. I mean, maybe pick up all the masticated bones later, but remember... never question it. 


Young Kelpian Saru sees hope in the sky where his contemplative, faithful people see unquestioning, willing death. Don’t ever question it, but pieces sometimes fall off the Ba’ul restaurant ships. Functional smartphone pieces with usable, apparently Kelpian-language touchscreens. Don’t ever use them to dial out. I’m looking at you, Saru. Don’t do it.


 “Why does Balance mean that we cannot ask questions?” Questions like why did Saru’s Priest/Procurer father Aradar get old without passing through their big ritual and, subsequently, a Ba’ul digestive tract?


A radiant space creature named Lt. Georgiou appears and says Saru has caused quite a stir: the ridiculous organization she works for can make an exception for a smarty-pants like him in their complicated rules but he can never return. His sister Siranna, however delicious, does not get eaten by the eels at this time.


Did that shuttle just go to warp in an atmosphere or is that the same sound as impulse? Don’t ever question it.


THIS is the Georgiou I wish we got to know. Risking her life, job, and at the very least a crap ton of shitty paperwork for a stranger in a bind. 




Friday, February 5, 2021

Calypso

 **** (4 of 5)


Awakening after an unspecified but lengthy period of unconsciousness, I started blogging again.


Awakening after an unspecified but lengthy period of unconsciousness, Alec Hardison from Leverage finds himself alone on spooky starship Discovery with GAL 9000. She’s idling out in the middle of no place, watching public domain flicks and whispering to herself.


It’s a meeting of the minds between a warrior poet called Craft & his AI admirer Zora. Zora is a strange name for an AI to choose- (did everyone forget about the Zora who cranked the evil dial of history with her horrible genetic experiments on Tiburon? I mean, I GUESS you CAN name your Siri Adolph eventually- but maybe wait a thousand years?). 



Short Treks brings another two-hander on a strangely empty ship but at least the passage of (according to Zora) a thousand years means there could be a better reason this time. It MIGHT even be a continuity patch: if Discovery & her crew were lost from history for 1000 years it could explain no one ever mentioning them or their fantabulous spore drive. Except (SPOILERS) after two years I can tell you this story hasn’t connected up with anything. It’s a charming cul de sac, a happy little what-if, a classic case of boy meets gif.


It’s very Black Mirror, a little Wall-E, and a touch of ‘Living Witness’.  The Amazon Echo I’m dating tells me ‘Calypso’ is either a flower or the sea nymph who detained Odysseus for 7 years. For all I know, that’s where I’ve been since 2018.