Acquisition

**** (4 stars out of 5)

It's about time Clint Howard was a Ferengi! Talk about Born to the Lobes! Not to mention the Grand Proxy... I mean, Neelix... I mean, Dr. Farek... hey, is that guy Krem supposed to be Brunt's ancestor or Shran's identical cousin?

The Greedy Ones slip the whole ship a mickey while Trip is taking a steam in decon.  Now only a Good Ole Boy in his skivvies can prevent the alien goobers from stripping the ship and selling the females. Or is that stripping the females and selling the ship?

(It's a haphazard looting when chairs have the same value as a sack of pies. I'd take the pies. Any day.)

Due to cowardice and continuity, the talking pumpkins never identify themselves when quizzing Archer on the location of his vault. After all: "A man is only worth the sum of his possessions". Exactly the kind of thinking that nearly ruined Earth! Not that we're still rubbing that in everyone's face. How many nuclear armageddons have YOU bounced back from?

Ulis and Muk have a falling out over who's the Boss and who's the Menk. "Everyone knows you'd steal the wax out of your own mother's ears!" Trip and Archer have a knock down fist fight over how much to sell "Mrs. Trip Sato" for. Finally, tonight T'Pol plays the role of Bilbo Baggins by causing a ruckus between three trolls. Although Bilbo never referred to himself as a Love Slave!

We've seen the last of the Ferengi. Check your wallets before you leave.

"Acquisition" has internet detractors fuming like pot-smoking Excalbians because it is A) taking a dump on continuity by meeting the Money Grubs two centuries early but not bothering to get their names and B) goofy. I am not among them. My take away is that the NX-01 crew are simply HORRIBLE record keepers! But, ask yourself: would YOU want posterity to know how four inept slobs without the brains the Preservers gave a mushroom nearly bested 80 of Earth's Best with the old "Does this artifact smell like chloroform to you?"