Saturday, March 16, 2013

Dark Frontier

*** (3 stars out of 5)
An itsy-bitsy Borg scout ship is no match for a single Voyager photon torpedo beamed inside! So, naturally, they scoop all the bits up. This is the stuff that auto-regenerates, right? And latches onto mobile emitters and grows baby drones and seizes computer control, right? Sure, crawl around in the debris. Put it right up to your face. Yeah, that's right, lick it!

Hey, only 143 people on Voyager? Didn't Tuvok just tell Noss there were 152? Were they offering some more sight-seers a lift somewhere? Or have they been dying left and right from this foolhardy BORG looting?

To hear Tom tell it, the new world economy took shape in the late 22nd century and money went the way of the dinosaur. (It evolved, developed spaceflight and emerged as a Delta Quadrant superpower?) Fort Knox became a museum. Even the Ferengi who tried to break in back in 2365 failed. So... the one thing that seems clear is Earth isn't on the gold standard anymore. Everything else about current currency is still up for grabs. Is Earth using replicator credits? Energy credits? Good faith? Fairy dust? No idea.

Speaking of not thinking things through... Seven reads the logs of her insane exobiologist parents who set out to find the Borg ON PURPOSE. Let me repeat: ON PURPOSE. Magnus and Erin Hansen dragged their tiny daughter into the reach of entities that destroy planets and souls. ON. PURPOSE.

I'm guessing if they asked an El-Aurian about the Borg the El-Aurian probably said "Sweet Space-Jesus! Are you people NUTS? Why don't you dip your kid in honey and tuck her into the mouth of a space-bear? Look, that's crazy- why don't you do a dissertation on Bolians? Bolians seem nice."

The Hansens invented a life-sign cloaking device called a biodampener. This device STILL works! Despite the fact that the Hansens and all their ideas were assimilated 22 years ago. Or is it all a ploy?  The local Borg Queen, contrary to the Borg philosophy, claims to want Seven of Nine back more than she wants the other 142 crew combined. Why? What makes her so collectible? Is Seven the chase figure?

Janeway's answer when Naomi Wildman pleads for a rescue of the seemingly traitorous Seven is one of the best things the Captain's ever said: "There are three things to remember about being a starship captain: keep your shirt tucked in, go down with the ship, and never abandon a member of your crew."

Chakotay believes the Hansens were overconfident. Janeway confidently assures Chakotay that she won't become overconfident.

The Queen claims Seven is the only Borg who's been restored to individuality. Uh... there was Locutus, Hugh, Lore's lost disciples... but best not to mention them if you need to butter Seven up for some reason. She wants Seven's help with that weak, paltry Species 5618 that keeps successfully resisting their direct assaults. Next plan: Earth's atmosphere seeded with nanoprobes.

And if that's what they want... well, Voyager stole one of their transwarp coils and got 15 years closer to home. That's kind of the same thing, right?

"Dark Frontier" is a feature-length event. which also gives us our first look at a Borg... city? Space station? Pretty cool. Lot of logical flaws, though. And I hate to say it, I'm getting bored of Borg.

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