Friday, October 5, 2012

Paradise Lost

*** (3 stars out of 5)
Cadet Riley Shepard and the Red Squad Kids who drank Leyton's Kool-Aid last episode donned their Brown Shirts with pride and proudly went out to shut down Earth's power for half an hour.

Supposedly, all this does is SCARE everyone? Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not baying for blood here, or for them to make a spin-off called Star Trek: Revolution Dark Angel: The Jericho Jerimiah Chronicle but in our world this would cause DEATHS. Am I meant to believe that nobody ANYWHERE bled out during genetronic spine replacement surgery? No 150 year olds froze to death in Arctic, Antarctic, or undersea habitats? No complicated interspecies births went awry? No dead people couldn't be revived merely because their stasis failed? No orbital skydivers lost positioning signals? No bad guys wandered off when their forcefield cells deactivated? Nobody ON EARTH was in the middle of transporting anywhere and never arrived? No "artfully balanced" alien environments leaked poisonous oxygen onto Earth's tourist friends? No high-speed hover trams lost anti-gravity and plowed into gleaming spires full of life-enriched artisans? Not ONE human even fell down his wine cellar stairs?

If so, kudos Humankind! Otherwise, resignation in disgrace might be going too easy on Admiral Leyton and his chumps.

Oh, other stuff happens, too. Mostly paranoid people talking in circles, a creepy changeling O'Brien taunting Sisko, and a kick-ass starship battle.

"Paradise Lost" doesn't even weigh the highest human cost of the global power outage. To put it discretely, in terms even young Riley Shepherd might understand: no one will ever know how many holodecks echoed with the near-infinite suffering of millions of horny dudes suddenly falling on their own dinks. 

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