Saturday, December 29, 2012

Nemesis

* (1 star out of 5)
Holy hell, this is like NINE shuttle crashes now! I'm starting to think Chakotay has never LANDED a shuttle before!
In Disney's least popular park- Vietnamland, the Vori abhor none but the Nemesis: the Kradin. The Krady beast. Kradinator. Krading Copies.

Vori Sturdy Defender Brone drills Chakotay in the tactics of "The Clash". How to call London back and so forth.

It seems Chakotay's universal translator must've taken a knock, too. It's set to Seldom Used Synonym. The Vori never say simply, cousin, what can be said stiffly and unnaturally: Trees are 'trunks', clothes are 'coverings', seen is 'glimpsed', the future is 'the soon after'. You may come to regard it as cleverly unfamiliar or deeply annoying. Perhaps both.

Kitten Rafin Smith from Starship Troopers is gunned down while wrestling his trembles to rages. Man, oh, man, Gloried Defenders, I wish I was watching Starship Troopers for the 14th time instead of this episode for the third.

But while trying to recover her missing first officer, Janeway has befriended Ambassador Treen of the Krady beasts. Oh noes!

The atrocities Chakotay sees the Kradin perform have all been Imaginary Stories during a drugged indoctrination procedure. The Kradin probably have all manner of REAL atrocities, but for those you'd have to watch them in their other roles: Predator, Predator 2, Alien vs. Predator, etc. I'm saying with maws like those they've probably yanked out a spine or two in their time.

The verdict? As the Vori say: "It's not so savoury."

I propose that the title "Nemesis" should never again be used in Star Trek. Ever. It's clearly cursed. HEED MY WARNING! You'd be sharp to do my tellings. Fathom? Avoid the Nemesis! (I wish it were as easy to stop talking like a Vori as it is to start.)

No comments:

Post a Comment