**** (4 stars out of 5)
Last time, on True Blood, Jason has become a were-panther. Will Sooki be able to... what?
Oh, right, Star Trek.
It's a callback to the Original Series once again as what we learned about Vulcans during 'Amok Time' has come back to haunt our newest newbie Vulcan pal Vorik.
72 years at best from his happy spawning grounds, on a ship with no lady Vulcans, Vorik's making the best of his first pon farr by fighting off the plak tow symptoms on his own, in his quarters, in the dark. (Too much meditation, contrary to the rumor, does not give a Vulcan hairy palms.)
Acting on ignorance and instinct, the young Vulcan engineer forces a telepathic betrothal bond on B'Elanna. And in the process forces the symptoms of pon farr on her as well.
"For such an intellectually enlightened race, Vulcans have a remarkably Victorian attitude about sex," opines the EMH. The doctor continues to respect confidentiality, but devises a possible solution and a possible partner in a "recreational/medical" hologram gal called T'Pera. Or, if you prefer, prostitute by prescription? The term might not apply, after all, they don't use money in the 24th Century. Also, it doesn't take. Vorik's choice is already made and Tuvok's uncomfortable non-advice is non-helpful.
Torres, meanwhile, sparks a confrontation with the xenophobic alien Sakari while trying to mine their gallacite without her top. By which I mean, horny as a targ. Which is to say, throwing herself at Tom Paris. Paris, to his credit, isn't so caddish as to take advantage of the chemically unbalanced woman... at least the first ten times she asks. When it becomes clear her life is on the line, Tom relents and is quite prepared to suffer the slings and arrows (possibly literal arrows, certainly literal slings and band-aids) of sex with the lady Klingon.
However, Randy... I mean, Vorik, is still up for a little frig or fight. And under the "rules" of improvised koon-ut-kalifee, Torres can name herself as her own defender if she doesn't want any of his Oingo-Boingo. And this is one Rumble in the Jungle whose outcome is never in doubt. (Torres is a biter.)
All's well that ends well, and Tom and B'Elanna illuminated a little truth about themselves in the deep, dark caves.
But what horror does Chakotay find among the bushes? A halfling of sorts. Part faerie, part human...
Sorry, that's True Blood again. "Blood Fever" is some other thing. Sexy, funny, and frightening, sometimes all at once, this is a great piece of television.
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