Saturday, June 9, 2012


***** (5 stars out of 5)

Returning by runabout from a seminar, Picard, Deanna, Data, and Geordi account to each other their  amusing (and dull) experiences. "Diane" avoided empirical research into inter species mating with a Ktarian lecher, while Picard was Hyp-Mo-Tized by a droning academic who went off on entirely the wrong topic.

Troi sees the others freeze eerily in mid-sentence, and when they start up again she suddenly has a frozen moment herself.

Next their starboard engine runs out of fuel: it's been in continuous operation for 47 days. Wuss! If I ran out of power in 47 days this wretched blog would still be regaling you with Original Star Trek.

A bowl of fruit rots before their eyes, and Picard's fingernails painfully grow an inch in an instant. Snickt! Pockets of space are moving through time at different rates, and at the center of this insanity they arrive at the Enterprise. It is frozen in combat with a Romulan warbird.

Geordi and Data devise phase discriminator forcefields from emergency transporters and a box of old rubber bands. Nearly skintight, the forcefields will allow them to go Time Diving without being caught up in the moment.

Their investigation reveals a red alert, Romulans everywhere, and Dr. Crusher with a disruptor blast in her tummy. Worst of all, a warp core breach is creeping quietly forward. Troi remembers what THAT means! Probably! It might take nine hours, but this ship is going to go ka-boom.

Picard has a giggle fit followed by a screaming fit. Their time shields are not completely protecting them, causing the 'temporal bends' if used too long.

When Data scans the Romulan singularity engine, time starts moving forward again, then suddenly backward. Do not adjust your sets!

Seized from behind, Geordi begins to die of temporal shock. Troi takes his forcefield off to put him on 'pause'. The Romulan who jumped him is also dying. He's an entity who assumed Romulan form to save his incubating young from the artificial gravity well. Normally, these guys nest in black holes, but mistaking the Romulan engine for their crib they've unintentionally caused this fiasco.

Data's tricorder-rewind comes in handy, and the away team gets into position for a split-second save.

"Timescape" is a personal favorite. Mind-blowing concept, cool action, even cooler inaction. Effects and drama working together cleverly. I think it's just fun every time. And I've seen it now what can't be less than a dozen times. O.K., so it's a remake of "Wink of An Eye", but it's a marked improvement.

Additionally, I love Data's experiment to test the aphorism "A watched pot never boils." Is boiling a kettle of water 62 times in a row a better use of one's time than repeatedly watching Star Trek? You decide. I'll wait.

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