A Piece of the Action

*** (3 stars out of 5)

A Gangster planet! What fun!

Sigma Iota II was culturally contaminated back in the 2160's by the USS Horizon before the Prime Directive of Non-Interference was in use. These humans dropped in one day on a planet of smart and EXTREMELY imitative humanoids, with wild tales of interstellar travel and amazing technology. They also left some books.

And in particular THE BOOK. The Iotians have based their entire society on one book called 'Chicago Mobs of the Twenties'. Good thing nobody loaned them 'The Sopranos' on DVD.

Anyway, what's done is done and from the costumes to the amoral codes to the fireplugs on the corners, these aliens have made their world into a celebration of classic organized crime. All the men are in rival gangs, all the women are molls, and tommy-gun drive-by shootings are all the rage.

So, of course, it's a comedy romp. Kirk and "Spocko" wear pinstripes and fedoras, pack heaters, and grind their gears trying to drive cars.

Bela Okmyx & Jojo Krako are the bosses of the largest rival gangs. Between playing pool and being jovial they put the hit on each other's goons and with the capture of spacemen they hope to use their advanced heaters to put a lot of hits on a lot more guys.

But the guy with the biggest heaters is still Scotty. Our engineer uses the ship-mounted phasers to stun all the Iotian mobsters around the block from up in orbit. Now Boss Kirk is in a position to say how it's gonna be.

Kirk's unconventional plan puts Okmyx in charge, and Krako as his lieutenant. All the other bosses will have to report to them, and all of Sigma Iotia II will report to the Federation. Every year the Feds will be back for their protection money.

Kirk tells his people the money will go toward guiding the Iotians toward a better world. Then again, McCoy thinks he may have lost his communicator down there. If these goons have proven anything, it's that they love to imitate. With a communicator transtator, they may soon figure out Starfleet technology. Who'll be boss of whom when that goes down? Somebody's going home in a box, and somebody's gettin' "A Piece of the Action".