Desert Crossing

*** (3 stars out of 5)
Archer helps bombastic Zobral of the Cygniai Expanse fix a flat and is soon invited back to his terrorist camp for a bowl of spiced dingus and a yerts-versus-skins game of beach lacrosse.

Zobral is in culture war with the Torothan Caste and he's heard rumours of the fair-minded human starship captain. A mighty warrior who freed the Suliban! A man of decency who'll fight for a noble cause! A man with a beagle and a baseball cap!

Rather than get embroiled or perhaps literally boiled in the conflict, Jon and Trip flee into the desert. Whereupon they start to boil. I mean, things start to get HOT! I mean, sweaty. No, sorry, they're probably still straight. I think.

The local government appears equally bored and enraged that aliens are getting chummy with their criminals, and so begin drafting petitions to change the legislation on the colour of the passports they may have neglected to issue. Also, they start lobbing bombs. What else are governments for?

Hoity (even slightly toity) T'Pol again name-drops the immediate burning need humans should have for some interference directives... without bothering to get out some parchment and a zero-gravity inkwell to start actually drafting the damn things.

"Desert Crossing" is elevated by the mere presence of the inked beard of the fearsome Curgan Clancy Brown. You may remember him from such cartoon voice acting work as virtually every American cartoon I've ever loved.

When It Rains...

**** (4 stars out of 5)
Whenever I see Klingon Chancellor Gowron throwing his weight around I always think back to something I heard him say repeatedly in the ST:TNG VHS video board game: "YOU WILL EXPERIENCE BIJ!" (pronounced BEEEJ, means 'punishment').

And we're all getting punished today: Gowron's jealous of Martok's wartime prestige so he's moving in to take command and credit, Ross and Sisko order Kira to hang out with the fine, upstanding men of the Cardassian rebellion, Odo discovers he has the same wasting disease as the Founders, and Dukat goes temporarily blind. (Not from looking at Kai Winn in the buff, you understand, but from peeking at the devil's books, I guess.)

Sisko gives Kira a drab new uniform and battlefield commission so the Cardassians won't have to think 'Bajoran' while she's bossing them around. Although it's really her face that gives it away... so... whatever. She's not making many friends teaching Killing Cardies 101 at the Cardassian Learning Annex anyway. Also, it's easier to work with Damar and think of him as a hero if Kira and Garak never bring up the way he shot their friend Ziyal in the back.

Dr. Bashir has a scheme to learn rapid organ replacement synthesis from whatever Odo's made of. We'll never know if this payed off... except otherwise Odo would never have found out he was sick. Well, the 'crumbling to dust' would've been a clue, but doctors like to feel useful. Like the desk-bound PADD-pushers at Starfleet Medical: who wouldn't lift a finger if it might help Odo. A cure for Odo might get back to the Founders. And nobody wants THAT. The Founders might be grateful or shamed by Solids who show compassion or something.

As Bashir deduces, that hardly sits well with the solids who infected them in the first place: our old pals, the spooks at Section 31.

"When It Rains..." is continues the gripping saga with desperate humanity eager to throw the Founders to the wolves, Sisko forced to do the same with all his non-Federation peeps (except Quark, I guess), the Kai throwing her blind ex-lover into the street, and Gowron settling in drunk behind the wheel of the bus he's throwing Martok under.

The High Ground

** (stars out of 5)

The non-aligned Federation trade partner Rutia IV has a history of violent insurrection. Beverly Crusher gets to see it up close when Ansata Separatists detonate a bomb near the cafe she is patronizing with Data and Worf. Just as the cops arrive, the doctor is abducted.

Her captor is a dark and charming bad boy (where have we seen that before this season?).

"If you need anything ask for me. My name is Kyril Finn. They know me." Really? Your underlings know you, huh? Imagine that.

The Ansata seek independence from the Rutians of the eastern continent.

"History has shown us that strength may be useless when faced with terrorism." The Rutian lady cop Riker consults with seems to agree: there's no negotiating with animals.

Beverly's son did a little better on his abduction hunger stike than Bev does today. All it takes is a whining 'Come on' from hand-wringing Finn. Om, nom, nom!

The Ansata consist of around 200 terrorists and perhaps 5,000 sympathizers. They use a dimensional shifter called the inverter which allows them to pop in and out of shielded areas. Inter-dimensional adaptive transport was abandoned in the mid-23rd century in the Federation because it's fatal.

"A dead martyr is worth ten posturing leaders," groans Finn of his therefore imminent death.

Geordi's adaptive subspace magnetosphere echogram might trace the inverter. Good thing! Could you repeat that into the replicator, please?

Beverly's ancestors were from North America. Luckily, Finn thinks of himself as George Washington. "I am willing to die for my freedom... and in the finest tradition of your own great civilization I am willing to kill for it, too." How delightful. Killing non-combatants for your freedom. Kind of like smashing a bread maker hoping donuts will fall out.

Riker tells one of the Ansata detainees that the Federation is willing to negotiate for Crusher's release, and over the cop's strident objections lets him go.

Data points out from his studies that terrorism works. Mexico gaining independence from Spain and "the Irish Unification of 2024" to name a couple. Picard doesn't believe "that political power flows from the barrel of a gun" but admits that humans have struggled with the morality of this issue for awhile now.

With the inverter, no one can stop them when they slap a bomb on the warp core. Geordi's quick thinking saves everyone, beaming the bomb into space tagged by his communicator.

When Finn hits the bridge, Picard slugs him and makes the jump back to his cave as a second prisoner. Bev is a little Stockholmed, taking Finn's side despite the fact that Finn just tried to explode her kid.

Finn tells Troi his demands: a Federation trade embargo/blockade against Rutia.

The Rutian alienness is subtle (and no doubt inexpensive): all the men have skunk stripes, and all the women seem to be red heads. Red-headed lady cop shoots Finn dead from behind as he threatens Picard, Bev talks a skunk-head boy out of killing Lady Cop.

"The High Ground" makes Dr. Crusher look weak-willed, and terrorism sound good. IS that a huge mistake? Star Trek is at its best when it asks us to consider all sides, so I have to give it a little credit. But it's one of the year's few flops, to my mind.